All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Everyone says I win the strip club
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Randomize
