Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize
