About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Randomize
