yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Randomize
