My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
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