yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
