I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
