both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
