meet me or not, i'm out of control
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
