What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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