i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
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