I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Panties = found
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize