He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
