is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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