just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Randomize
