Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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