I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
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