I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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