To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Randomize