If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
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