So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Randomize
