K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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