I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
