I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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