she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
