She is in my trunk
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
Randomize
