Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
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