i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Found your dick twin last night
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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