redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
Randomize
