you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize