i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize