So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
