There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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