Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
