if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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