went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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