I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
my poor anus
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
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