You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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