i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Randomize
