Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
home. puking in laundry basket.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
