So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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