I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
i would punch a child for taco bell
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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