whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Randomize
