Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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