i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
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