Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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