At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
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