what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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