It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
