ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
