I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Randomize