Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
